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Advice on Internet Dating

While mixing with the opposite sex through the Internet, it’s desirable to follow some of the rules below:

 

  1. Be on guard against a man who is so busy with his work that he can’t meet with you, even during his vacation time. If a man is constantly busy attending meetings with his friends, doing laundry, cooking, and so on, you can imagine how you’ll fit into his life.
  2. Beware of men who can’t be with you, even online, during the holidays and other dates which are significant to you. For example: your birthday, Valentine’s Day, or just when you need simple emotional support. If he can’t change his daytime plans and put you first, even if only sometimes, you’ll always take last place in his life.
  3. Be attentive to everything he tells you about himself, and try not to miss any detail. If the stories, facts, and arguments designed to excuse himself change every day, it’s a caution sign to you. The same red flag is an indefinite answer on your neatly stated questions.
  4. Be very attentive to his stories meant for gaining your sympathy -- especially about the death of relatives and friends or about severe diseases. Keep in mind that if a story sounds too outrageous to be the truth, it’s most likely a falsehood.
  5. Beware of men who try to make you feel guilty for the questions you ask. If a man tries to accuse you of aggressive behavior in response to your remark, it’s not unreasonable to recall an old saying about the best protection frame.
  6. Be on guard against men who use their kids as an excuse against the possibility of meeting with you at his home. Usually they say they don’t want their children to get accustomed to you before he’s sure of the seriousness of the relationship. This uneasiness can be fully excused in the first months of your communication. However, if you have already met several times at your own home and he expresses a desire for coming to you more and more, it’s clear enough that the problem is not in the kids, but in their father.
  7. Beware of so-called “difficult to catch” men. These are the type whose cell phones are always switched off, or they constantly forget to call you during the day. We advise you to prick up your ears if he always contends that he hasn’t received your call or message, and if he often blames his operator for a bad connection.
  8. If he hasn’t appeared online and has not written you an answer in spite of all his promises, strike him off your contact list. If you forgave him for having such a disrespectful attitude toward you, even if only once, you can be sure that he would repeat the same behavior.
  9. Be on guard against men whose attitude towards you constantly changes. First he can’t stop talking to you and he writes several times a day, then he disappears for a week or two. Such behavior is based only on making you the target of his capricious and careless whims. Play by your own rules and live by your own schedule!
  10. Investigate the information you know about your admirer. If you know where he works, find a website of his firm and compare the info from the site with that of one that he’s given you. Try to use the Internet to pick up as much information about your admirer as you can before you meet with him in the real life.

 

8 Ideas for Managing Conflict

 

Alas, nobody is perfect. Regardless of your efforts, or of how loving and respectful you are, you can’t avoid some difficulties. By using the following advice, difficulties won’t be something that can do much harm to your relationship. The next time you feel that a dispute might flare up, recall these 8 methods to carry on discussions.

 

  1. Let him voice his disagreements in full.
    It seems you can’t bare the thought of being interrupted – but let him speak, even if you don’t agree with what he is speaking about.
  2. Try to understand what he is speaking about.
    It’s easy to be entrapped, thinking you know what a conversation is about, when in fact you can be mistaken in your conclusions. If he felt you actually understood what he was speaking about, you could finish your discussion considerably faster.
  3. Do not say anything that you will regret later.
    Always examine your relationship as you would a glass. A glass would be solid, smooth, and clean




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