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Questions – answers Child Angriness

Child’s angriness


Recently, I have often heard my three-year-old daughter say, “Mom, you are bad!” Naturally it disappoints me. What is the reason behind such an attitude towards me? How should I react?


The answer is simple – don’t take it seriously. Such temporary anger in a child has certainly been provoked by some situation. Try to understand what problem is hiding behind your child’s words. Listen to your child, and try to talk about the feeling which makes her say this unpleasant phrase. Don’t get angry with yourself and don’t punish her. This will only worsen the situation as well as your own mood. Show that you sympathize with her and are trying to understand her emotions. Give her a hug, demonstrating your love. Later, when you are both calm and the tension dies down, you can talk about the feeling you had at the moment. Your voice should be very kind and motherly. “I understand that you were angry with me. But I really love you and your words hurt me. I know that you don’t actually feel this way. Let’s try not to hurt each other.”


Staying neutral


I have two sons and they frequently fight with each other. I am tired of these fights, but I still can’t learn to react properly. What should I do in this situation?


The worst thing is for you add to the overall situation with your raised voice. “Stop this at once! Now you both get punished!” Never take the side of one of the brothers. As a rule, parents try to protect the younger child and don’t try to understand the reason for the conflict. This leads to spoiling and pampering of the younger child and makes the older child feel envy and unjust punishment.


It is helpful if you leave them on their own - of course if there is no threat of a serious fight. Don’t watch remotely, but speak about your emotions: “I get disappointed when you cannot find a common language.” “I will be happy if we would be able to solve your problem by ourselves”.


Sleeping on time


Four months ago I gave birth to a wonderful daughter, Polina. From the very first day, I was very attentive to her needs and have always taken her in my arms if she started crying. She is growing and becoming heavier, but it still takes her a lot of time to fall asleep. I end up having to spend about an hour keeping her in my arms before she is asleep. Could you tell me if there is a way to teach my child to fall asleep by herself?


Sleeping and a healthy diet are the major conditions of your child development. But it is wrong to think that a child should only eat and sleep before the age of one year. That’s why constant lulling is not always good. By the age of 4-5 months, the average daily norm of sleeping by your daughter has gradually reduced. Psychologically, it is better to be oriented towards the needs of a child but parents usually prefer when children live according to a certain regime. When a child starts to rub his or her eyes and cry, most mothers take him or her in their arms and lull. But it is not a good thing to lull all the time because you already know that it is very tiring.


If your child is used to falling asleep in your arms, you should change this habit gradually. After holding the child for 4-5 minutes, put him or her near you. Sit and pat for some time, than try to slightly touch the child. After some time the child will fall asleep just because you are near and eventually simply leaving a door will be enough.


Be patient. It can take several months to teach your child to fall asleep without your presence. But don’t force the process under any conditions.


The dry outcome


A whole bunch of problems can hide behind enuresis. Even the most patient parents sometimes give up in a fight for “dryness and comfort”.


Enuresis can be a big trouble for parents and a real tragedy for a kid. Tears, talks, threats, promises, hysterics – that’s the way usually chosen to fight one of the most common problem of small kids (according to statistics up to 10% of modern children have enuresis). Parents should first try to find out the real cause of the problem.


There are two type of enuresis – primary and secondary.


Babies’ problem.


Primary enuresis is the one kept for the moment of birth. Neurologists consider that a child is able to feel that his urinary bladder is full and hence give the signs by the time he is 7 months old (some psychoneurologists lower this age to 3 months). Ideally, all hygiene skills are formed during the first two years of living. A child should ask either ask to use the bathroom or do it himself. However, the night enuresis is usually diagnosed

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