Personality Development Within Children
At 2-3 years of age, a child becomes aware of the world and learns to think. He or she also becomes aware of what is good and what is bad -- and impulsivity of the child begins to comply with the rules set up by you.
“An adult behaves this way or that as a result of a long and ergic built system of behavior due to upbringing,” believes G. M. Piskunova, a Candidate of Biological Sciences. And this is accepted by many other psychologists.
But the child just starts to master this. That is why it is important that the child should have predominating positive affections –- joy, empathy, credit -- and negative affections should be temporary and passing. Give compliments to the child when he or she manages something successfully. When you compliment the child, the complimented behavior becomes attractive for the child and desirable for you.
Along with a compliment, there should also be a reproof. But the child is subject to joyful emotions rather than to heartbreak. Soon he or she will learn to understand your discontent, heartbreak, or disappointment. But remember that the child can have a deep sense of shame and run into melancholia.
Be careful with reproof – it can be too hard for the child. He or she is not capable of always controlling his or her own actions, and temptation is stronger (to eat a sweet, to get a toy, i.e. something forbidden) that is why it is sometimes better to explain, to talk, to avert, and not to scold or shame.
Advice No6 – the child should see how the family members show empathy to each other and the child should take part in this empathy. Mom cut a finger – pity her; dad is tired – do not make noise. The child quickly catches (“becomes infected”) other people’s emotions.
Rude words, bad-tempered tones, and shouts are all absorbed by the arising personality of the child and remain in the unconscious for the whole life.
That is why, if you want to introduce good manners to a child, you should analyze your own manners. It is noticed that a child shows his or her impressions in the way he or she plays (treats a doll roughly, shouts at a teddy-bear) and then carries all these over to the environment. So again we remind: bring up positive emotions within the child in the broad sense of the word, remember that this period is the period of imitation.
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